” Love (the bastardized version most of us give and receive): This is conditional love. I’ll love you if you do this, or act that way, or perform in some way that meets my expectations. Most of us received conditional love as children. Most of us needed then to hide our hating, our sexuality, our tears and/or our vulnerabilities because those human qualities were not accepted by parents or society. So we put on a performance by denying those unapproved aspects of ourselves to get the maximum number of strokes. It was not real acceptance of ourselves we received as children, just an absence of condemnation of the aspects we hid. Conditional love is widespread today among adults in most relationships. We couldn’t possibly love them if they do this, or they dislike us, or they have the wrong views, etc. If you don’t act the way I think you should act, then I’ll reject you. You are totally unacceptable to me if you lie, cheat, two-time me, hate me, treat my family wrong, don’t agree with me on issues, etc. But if you do jump through my required hoops, then I’ll love you (conditionally, obviously). Conditional love created many trauma knots in us as children which we then later as adults need to untie.”

and I would agree on that most of us love in a “conditional way” if we weren’t it might have been a peaceful world for us all to live in…
.-= jefferson faudan´s last blog ..What Benefits Do You Get From A Home-Based VPA? =-.

sana! ewan! bahala na! lol )

tulad ng 143 koH! hahaha!